Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Happy Anniversary (to me).

It has been one whole year since the cancer debacle. 


I don't have cancer, nor do I mean to make light of the disease in any way. 


This is the one year anniversary of being told that I AM a cancer. Those words still sting. They were told to me by someone I trusted and respected. I was told that I was the only one with any issues and that I was welcome to leave if I couldn't get with The Program. 


I was devastated. I came home crying the Ugly Cry and continued crying for about two days. I had never been spoken to like that EVER. I replayed the conversation in my head incessantly for days. My husband was invaluable and unwavering in his support of me. Our school counselor acted on my behalf as well. My teammates comforted me and if it weren't for them I might have quit my job mid-year.


I can't believe it's been a year already. I hoped I'd be 'over it' by now. I guess I am, but then again it affects me daily. 


After The Talk I sought help through a career counselor online. I truly thought I must be in the wrong career if, after 12 years,  I was comparable to a dreaded life-threatening disease. She was amazing and helped me see that although I didn't want to make my unhappiness about The One Who Shall Not Be Named....in the end it was. My husband helped me with that epiphany too. His suggestion? "Why don't you just transfer?" Hello??? How simple it sounded! 


After digesting the idea of a transfer and all the ways it would impact our family, I went for it. Fate has a way of helping things along and 2 weeks before school started I found myself at a very different school. I love it. My children love it. I have great teammates and a fantastically supportive and fun-loving principal. I'd never have found this new home if it hadn't been for The Talk.


Perhaps sometimes we have to be kicked from the nest in order to learn to fly?? I didn't enjoy the kick, but the flying is magnificent.